I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
this will be a night to untag.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
