i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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