She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
