Sry I called you an 8
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
The feeling are messing with the penis
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Randomize
