goodnight i made you a song goodbye
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
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He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
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i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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