i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
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we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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