I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
