He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize