I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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