so let's talk penis.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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