at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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