if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize