Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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