I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
