I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
