She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
third nipple confirmed
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
You were trust falling into bushes
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
