and my herpes radar will keep us safe
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize