his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
