did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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