Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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