Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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