Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Can vaginas get frostbite?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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