Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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