it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
