but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
