she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
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