I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize