He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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