Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize