Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize