About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
