Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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