Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
