i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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