My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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