I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
