They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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