He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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