: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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