Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
We're facebook friends in real life
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
