awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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