Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
