Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
you win again, gameday.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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