the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize