i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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