Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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