were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I AM VODKA MAN
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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