we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
My day in three words: secret purse cake
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
