Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
