i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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