someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
