I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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