remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
